MJL 5th Annual Walk for Hope

Gosh, where do I start?  This day will definitely be one of the days in my life that I will never forget.  On the morning of September 17, 2011 hundreds of people came together for one cause, and that cause being for the awareness and support of Depression and Suicide Awareness.  I have never felt so much love and togetherness in one place and it felt great!  Molly Lincoln would/is so lucky and proud to have loved ones that are so passionate about her life that they have put her memory to a good cause for a community that has lost so many and that deals with a disease that society has created this stigma that frowns upon Mental illnesses.

I arrived with my dog snoopy and his "walk for hope" bandana geared up ready to walk for a cause.  We got there at around 7:45 or so and people were slowly starting to trickle in.  Before I knew it the whole auditorium building was full of people everywhere.  Some people had shirts that were in the memory of their loved one they had lost to suicide.  Others were just putting the names and years they lost their loved ones on a walker bib that they pinned to their clothing to show as they walked.  To my shock, there were some youth that had 3 names on the back of their shirts and bibs.  I couldn't believe it.  If you don't think suicide is real, it is, and the mental health stigma is not a joke.  It has really hit hard in this area.  Iowa and Quad Cities, wake up!!!  Talk about it! Get help! You are not alone and you don't have to be ashamed!!  It can happen to anybody and everyone deals with life and trajedies in a different way.  The best advice I was ever given from a mental health professional was that the more people I share my story with and how I am feeling, the better I will feel.  Of course, at the time, I was severely depressed, embarrassed, and knew that if I told anyone they would think I was a nut job and that I was crazy.  It's okay to feel that way in the beginning, you share when you feel the time is right.  I chose to go public when I accepted the title of Ms. Iowa American Coed 2011.  It was time.

As I stood up to grab the mic to speak, I can honestly say I was quite nervous for the first few seconds.  This was the largest crowd I had ever stood in front of to share my story and how I got to Iowa.  I was proud of the fact that I was able to hold back my tears.  I was happy but I was also sad because of all the grief everyone had experienced due to suicide and depression and the fact that my family could have been in their positions.  I let everyone know that I was no longer ashamed and that I do still struggle at times and even still currently treat and have found hope in the Vera French Foundation.  A beauty queen such as myself can be depressed too, and like I said, it can happen to anybody.  What really warmed my heart was the applause when I was able to present MJL with the money I had raised with the help of my law firm in the amount of $90.  That felt good.  I know it wasn't much but it made a difference in that we at the firm shared in our part of helping fund such a great cause and even I know that every little bit counts!! They were surprised and I loved it because I purposely didn't tell them.  They have been there for me in more ways than anyone would know.  The contacts they have helped me to build to get help for myself and to do work for other people has been amazing and I will definitely come back next year.  Maybe I can come back with a national title and speak on what I have been able to accomplish for mental health on a national level.  My goal, share my story, get people to talk, break the stigma.

I appreciated all the response I got from everyone who came up and spoke to me.  The words of encouragement, the welcoming to their home state, it means more than anyone will ever know.  As a transplant trying to get out in the community with a country accent and an Iowa title is not the easiest thing, LOL!!!  My dog Snoopy, well I was kind of nervous how he would react to so many people being around him.  He usually pulls back from large crowds because of his past of being abused/neglected as a puppy.  He was loving all the attention with the treats and belly rubs and petting.  I think he knew that everyone there was there because they needed to heal.  I think he did his part and I am so proud of my lil fur child, lol.  We made it through all 3 miles and at the end he was more than ready to get some food and sit down.  I loved the response of everyone that came to my table wanting autographed photos and words of kindness.  It meant and means a lot!!  One girl told me that I could write about how awesome she was in my blog when I mentioned they could take a card to follow.  Sorry I am bad with names, and yes honey, you are awesome!!! You came out for a great cause and your loved one would be so proud that you took part in an event to celebrate their memory!!!

Thank you MJL Foundation (Betsy, Michelle, and Jennifer) and Thank you Vera French!  I am so happy to have found you and you have made a big difference in my life here in Iowa.  I will continue in my journey in this fight against the mental health stigma and reach out to my community beyond the title even if I don't win the national title.  This is me and always will be and nothing will change my past and what I have been through.

My next step, to walk in memory of my daddy Walter "Hubert Jr." Snodgrass at the Quad Cities Light the Night Walk 2011.  If anyone would like to donate or join me on my walk team for Team Hubert Jr.  Please visit
http://pages.lightthenight.org/ia/QuadCiti11/TeamHubertJr I am the Quads Cities Honorary Walk Chair and this walk will take place on October 14th 2011 at Modern Woodman Park.  Lots of fun activities and things to do before the walk starts for all ages!

Thank you!!

Monica Lacovitch
Ms. Iowa American Coed 2011  http://www.gocoed.com/ and vote for me for people's choice! :)